Imagine for a moment you've lost everything...
The love of your life just left you out of nowhere and all your money is gone, you've been fired, your car broke down and to top it off you just broke your plastic spoon as you went to eat your favourite ice cream (which is now melting).
Did you know...you can STILL FEEL GOOD during your worst moments?
Don't worry, I didn't believe it myself when my coach first told me.
But I listened, reserved judgment and entertained the idea.
What if, during my worst moments I could feel good?
That single thing would change my life.
It turns out it is true.
This type of thinking and practice is not for everyone, so be warned.
If you like playing the victim because of the attention you get and you're an EXPERT at making excuses as to why you underperform, this website and lesson are NOT for you.
If, however, you would like to learn how to do this read on.
Take a moment to seriously answer these 3 questions:
The 3rd question is where 98% of people will fail at this practice.
Let me further illustrate a point for you.
Almost everyone around you is in REACTION mode to the external events occurring on a daily basis.
The weatherman says it will be cold and rainy, equates to weather-controlling your feelings.
You get a big, unexpected bill in the mail and you freak out, uncontrollably worrying about where the money will come from. Equates to money in control of your feelings.
Don't get that promotion? That job is now in control of you.
Do someone talks smack about you behind your back? Those people are living rent-free in your headspace.
You get...wait for it...UNFRIENDED on FB!
Or...you get fired, hired, replaced, put out, cut off, laughed at, thanked or ANY other situation, circumstance or external event happens TO you and you equate a feeling EQUAL TO or the OPPOSITE to that event depending on your perception and how you frame it in your mind.
If it is bad...then you may feel bad.
If it is good...then you may feel good.
If it is good...then you may feel bad.
DID YOU KNOW THERE IS A FOURTH OPTION?
If it is bad...then you may feel good. <<--THIS IS WHERE WE ARE TODAY.
As mentioned this lesson is NOT for the majority of people.
Only those committed to truly taking charge of the emotional quality of their existence - is that YOU?
You CAN feel good when you have the worst happen.
You CAN feel good when you fail an exam, lose a client, get fired, cut off in traffic, miss the bus, not get invited to the shin-dig.
This DOES NOT mean you will not have normal human reactions and reasonable responses to events.
If someone hits you in the face then this lesson is not about turning around and thanking them, that would be an unreasonable response to the event.
This is about YOU MAKING JUDGEMENT CALLS ON IF THE EVENT IN QUESTION YOU DEEM A WARRANTED AND APPROPRIATE RESPONSE.
Taking the example above; if someone hits you it would be perfectly normal to feel anger and hurt. The point of this lesson is that if that happens it doesn't make you feel that way for hours, days, weeks or years.
Yes, I have had clients with seemingly "insignificant" events and they take a lifetime toll because they don't understand how to do this.
HERE IS WHAT YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND
1. Law of Rhythm
The tide goes in and the tide goes out.
Night follows day, day follows night.
Seasons follow each other.
Your life follows cycles and UNDERSTANDING that at the subconscious level is the key to feeling good.
Because you KNOW (not just guessing) you KNOW that brighter days are coming BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO.
It cannot remain winter forever.
There are natural laws at play in your life. Ignorance does not mean they do not exist. Regardless of your belief system, gravity is here and very real. Good, bad or indifferent you walk off a cliff...you go down.
Become aware of who you are.
Become aware of why you are here.
Become aware that everything happening in your life is shaping you to become the person you need to be, to prepare you for what's about to happen.
It is all happening FOR YOU not against you. Confuse that you'll feel bad.
3. Law of Polarity
There is no inside of a room without and outside, no up without a down, nor hot without cold.
Your life CANNOT JUST BE GOOD ALL THE TIME AND IT CAN'T BE SHI* ALL THE TIME.
The difference between the VOLUME of shi* you have will be largely dependant on your attitude and WHOLEY determined by how much of that attitude is upbeat, joyful, positive, and grateful.
Polarity means you must experience good to know what bad is and vice versa.
You HAVE TO HAVE BOTH!
BOTH are learning experiences and nothing more.
NEITHER are indications of your worth.
4. Study Non-Fiction, Self-Help Books Daily.
Forget about ever trying to succeed if you don't do this one. Only a small percentage of small percentage luck out by just "having it" to be successful.
The rest of us, it's a cultivated, groomed, finely curated, personal work that has been crafted over decades.
The WHO you see regarding those other successful people have been put together by a big combination of beautiful ideas, bold ambitions, the courageous appetite for risk and adventure and endless self-development and self-analysis.
IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO KNOW YOUR WEAKNESSES.
IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS.
YOU'VE GOT TO KNOW YOURSELF.
5. Respond Don't React.
Winners respond, everyone else reacts.
Choose to consciously accept the compliments and reject the negative chit-chat.
You have the ability to pause and think before you respond. In that split second you are in control of what to do with the event in front of you.
This is a trained response but once you are aware of this practice you can begin at once walking around asking yourself...
What ideas will I accept from others today?
What comments will I ignore, which ones will I accept?
Reject what doesn't serve you, accept what moves you.
Lastly, a situation in your life that you deem as negative or bad is simply because of your perception.
Most people frame situations in a way that is totally disempowering and then wonder why they have no motivation and walk around like a tired sack of ailments and bereavements.
If you reframe your perception around the event you are experiencing make sure you reframe it into an empowering moment that you are learning from, taking part of and using to propel your life in the direction you chose to go.
No event is inherently good or bad, your thinking makes it so.
Therefore it is in your control how you look at any event and if you see it as bad you will feel bad if you see it as good you will feel good.
PS. You will need to invest your time over the next few years practicing mastering reframing situations to alter your perception to find the good in any situation, that you choose.
You think bad thoughts you will feel bad.
You think good thoughts you will feel good.
PPS. You will not be able to do this 100% of the time, no one can. But you can get to a point where 99% of the time you are feeling the way YOU choose to, regardless of the world around you.
Explore the idea of working with Vaughan and let him coach you to excellence and transform your life today.